Blog #9

In my life, I’ve been inundated with pop culture. However, my dealing with is came at a much later age than most. In my house growing up, we did not have cable, we did not have any gaming systems other than the original Nintendo (complete with its sub-par graphics), and we did not get any magazines other than a conservative news magazine. My brother and I also were either home schooled or attended private Christian schools. Because of my parents’ attempts to shelter me and my brother, we became less affected by the pressures of pop culture. We were freer to explore whatever we deemed worthy and did not have to answer to others telling us we should pursue other things. Words cannot express my gratitude to my parents for this early growing environment. My brother and I, despite our sheltering, never had the issues and dealings of the world hidden from us. In fact we were encouraged the other way, to learn about the world from all angles and decide what was right. My parents, in sheltering us, didn’t shelter us from the world, just the pressures to conform to it. But I would be lying if I said that pop culture has no effect on how I see gender roles.

Everywhere in pop culture you see few categories for every gender. For women, they are given three options. One, they can be overly sexified like the porn industry. Two, they can be quiet and submissive, never voicing their opinions to others. Or three, they can be over-opinionated, rude, backbiters. None of these options are worthwhile goals for women, nor are they characteristic of women as a whole. Sure as the sun rises and falls, there are women who or moments when women fall into one of these categories, but in general, most women are a unique combination of all three and more. For men, they are also given three choices. One, they can be nerdy home-bodies who read and play video games a lot. Two, they can be overly muscular and buff, and often narcissistic in the process. Or three, they are compassionate, understanding, and gay. Heaven forbid a man be a combination of these or that he be understanding and not given the (in this case) negative connotation of being “gay.” And who’s to say that a gay man could not be nerdy, or muscular? Seeing these limited choices, I myself often wonder what category I fit into and often find myself judging others based on these pop culture categories. Judging like this, without even looking past the surface or a particular moment in time, can only lead to isolation with yourself and hurting of others, neither on a good choice. People, at least 95 times out of 100, are not like the way we first judge them, nor do they fall strictly into a pop culture category.

Seeing culture’s representation of race and class has had a similar effect, as I see pop culture portray certain parts of the country and parts of the world with specified stereotypes (examples: people from the south being cowboys or rednecks, African American people as animalistic in ads, Middle Eastern people are convenience store owners). Again, I’m guilty of failing the battle sometimes to resist the representation of different classes and races. But it’s a fight that I try harder to fight than the gender issue, honestly. For example, my lack of race issues became very evident to me this past election. With an African American now in the highest possible leadership position in this country for the first time, one would think I would have reacted in huge excitement and shock. And while I am proud of the steps that brought this about, I made far less of a big deal about it than almost everyone I know. I saw him for who he was: a man with a family running for a political office.

When I see things in media that seem sexist to me, I usually won’t say anything about it unless it’s shockingly that way, meaning it has to take something extreme for me to say something about it. Most of that is simply due to the fact that I don’t notice. I tend to not read magazines or watch many commercials (or if I do to tune them out), and I don’t notice until someone brings it up to me. At that point, I’ll usually pay more attention and then have something (usually very strong) to say about it. Also, when I hear the word “feminist” most of the things that come to my mind are negative stereotypes like harshly-opinionated, butch, hosses, male-haters. Most of the stereotypes revolving around feminists I know are NOT true, but I also know that a lot of my experiences in life involving women who would claim the name “feminist” have been more negative and have greatly affect my opinion. As a woman who wants to stay home and raise kids as my career, I’ve faced a lot of negativity from women who would call themselves “feminists,” which I’m sure has tainted my general view of feminists. But to be sure, I would classify myself as one. But only to the extent that I feel that women should have equal rights, pay, and leadership positions; that they have the right to choose or not choose any of that and not be looked down on because of their choice.